Friday 25 March 2011

Dating your ex...?



Hermes Conrad: Dating your ex Fry? Have you lost all self respect?
Fry: But things are different this time. Last time she was demanding and possessive, but now she wants me to do stuff and stay with her all the time...

Sunday 20 March 2011

Earth calling Zach

F: which way does the earth move round ... clockwise or anti-clockwise?
Zach: errr.... ummm .... ANTI-CLOCKWISE!
F: Yes that's right
Zach: Hey and I worked that out with just my brain and this little iPhone, I'm a genius! Hahaha!

Sunday 13 March 2011

The bigger picture...

Was searching the internet trying to look at the bigger picture regarding all the recent extreme weather disasters and came across the following piece about events in the UK in 1955 which made me smile for many reasons! So often technology meant to help the world gets used for war and it's nice to know the pendulum swings both ways...

1955: Britain's big freeze
Deep snow and freezing temperatures continue across Britain leaving many parts of the country cut off from essential supplies.
More than 70 roads in Britain are blocked by snow, according to the Automobile Association and hundreds of vehicles have been abandoned in snowdrifts as high as 30ft (9m).
Rail travel has also been severely affected and some areas in northern Scotland have not had a train service for several days.
The RAF has been working flat out to drop food and medical supplies to affected areas.

Concerns for the welfare of the country's thousands of sheep are mounting as many are completely cut-off from food supplies.


Monday 7 March 2011

Heartfelt abuses

So why don’t you go now?
Oh just go on go now

Don’t need your excuses
Your heartfelt abuses

Your silence speaks volumes
Like fancy dress costumes
That masks dust and decay
From our love and obey

Oh why don’t you go now?
Please just go on go now

Don’t need your bad reasons
For changing the seasons

You turned my sun shining
Into whining and pining
Whilst watching daydreams
Fall apart at their seams

the pen-knife is mightier than...

Zach: Hey mum you know that film where the man gets his arm trapped under a big rock and he has to cut it off with a pair of toenail clippers...?
J: Errr yeah it's called 127 hours and I think you'll find it was a pen-knife not toenail clippers!

Sunday 6 March 2011

Tone it down

G: Hey have a look at this girl's photos on Match.com. I don't want to be rude and it may just be my eyes, but is that what passes for 'athletic and toned' these days?
J: Well she is a bit chunky but you need to remember that to a woman 'athletic and toned' means 'I have a gym membership but I never use it...'